his breathing was laboured and fast
I wanted to cry but no tears would fall,
my hopes for his future had past.
My foot didn’t tap; my hands were not wrung
my eyes wouldn’t study his face
His body lay still and mine mimicked his,
I longed not to be in this place.
The doctors poured in and spoke over my head,
they whispered in hushed knowing tones.
Though I was still I was screaming inside
but all that came out was a moan
the tools that they used; the ultrasound wand,
confirmed what they already knew.
they whispered in hushed knowing tones.
Though I was still I was screaming inside
but all that came out was a moan
the tools that they used; the ultrasound wand,
confirmed what they already knew.
My son was born with holes in his heart,
How many? They hadn’t a clue.
How many? They hadn’t a clue.
One by one they left me alone
the door hissed as it closed,
the shaking began, would I be sick?
I slowly redressed him in clothes
I phoned his dear dad to give him the news,
the axe that I swung cut him deep,
I chopped up our life and hung up the phone,
Death was so close, would he reap?
Milestones were newly defined
Smiles and firsts and all those sweet steps
were just not enough without time.
To live in the present, within a moment
a second, a minute, an hour
That is the gift that God gave to me
Loves miraculous power.